I was wondering does everybody else talk, ask questions to themselves like I do? I see pictures or little movies in my head as I play the questions out. Do you? I was just doing that the other day as Van asked me "Robert so what's up?" Think about it for a second....... in about 1.27884 seconds, you know what I mean, or almost prior to the question actually being finished, I have played out 2 to 3 scenes in my head of how or what I'm going to say. The funny thing is all I could spit out was:
Me - "Dude its girl trouble"
Van - "Ohhh"
Do you do that too where your guts are going up down but my face says "It's cool" "I'm fine" Weird!!!
Anyways, I have learned a lot over the last few weeks and just heard it put this evening in a way I really liked. Just because we have been thru hard times in the past and say were healed, doesn't mean we are done or really got much farther then being able to say I think I am healed. I know I recently put more stock in the words I am healed, I have soul searched, and I have asked myself some tough questions lately. I love people that challenge me to be better.
Mind you I say this now (when I say "now" I mean this exact moment in time) because a few days ago or even 24 hours ago I was struggling. It doesn't matter what it was I was struggling with, what matters was I was trying to lean on something that wasn't completely healed.
It is a good thing to have smart, intelligent people in our lives that are willing to test themselves, search themselves. LOL, that sounds so dam corny, but shit it's fricking true.
I struggle the most I think sometimes not giving people the right to think differently then me. Wow, did I just say that. Have you every thought about something to the point you knew you were so right and by God what the hell is this other person thinking. Look it's so dam simple, it's doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure it out, why the hell you having such a hard time with this concept? Okay let me line it up for you sweetpea (hehehe) 1 + 1 =2 and if you took a poll 9 out of 10 people would say this. Which is exactly what I happen to think so what is your problem?
Yikes, it sounds really bad when you type it or read it, doesn't it!!! Why is it so hard to understand people sometimes? I usually communicate with people that speak the same language as I. So what is the problem?
Being an adult is tough. In my opinion the people we look at and go they are so self confidant are really the same as you but with just a minor change. Think of the cat in the movie Shrek and remember the little pose with the big eyes looking up so submissively. Thats how I think people feel on the inside. Where I think self confidant people seem to differ is not on how they feel inside but in the fact that even though they are scared they make a decision. Even if the decision is one of those ones you just say f-it, the courage to make a decision is what I believe we call self confidence most of the time.
I was watching a movie the other day and heard another statement that kinda sorta goes along with my train of thought. If not its my blog. The statement went something like this:
"Becoming an adult involves the right to make our own decisions and getting the pleasure or pain of the result. Where the problem lies is we don't realize we are already adults till 10 or 12 decisions into it. Resulting many times with us facing the consequences or are still trying to repair the results of these decisions years and years latter.
Applies to me how about you?
